“Suddenly, there were no appointments to miss. No groceries to forget. My keys remained in my purse, along with my sunglasses, and random scraps of paper reminding me of to-do items put on hold. For the first time in my life, I felt genuinely free. How could this be? The world was in turmoil. Amid all the illness, sadness, unemployment, and loss of life, how could I feel tranquil?”
Two months ago, my doctor told me I had a respiratory infection (which my anxiety told me was definitely COVID-19), and I haven’t left my house since. I spent the first three weeks lazily in bed. Then my state locked down, and the panic followed shortly thereafter. Though I had nowhere to be, just the thought of being trapped with no choices, no options freaked me out. My instincts told me to get the hell out of there, but alas ‘flight’ was not an option.
Then something magical happened. A calm came over me. Something deep inside me settled. Everything felt right.
I could feel the lifting of a weight — the burden of my daily struggles with ADHD.
I had no flights to catch, no social engagements booked, no deadlines (to attempt) to meet. There were no appointments to miss. No groceries to forget. My keys remained in my purse, along with my sunglasses, and random scraps of paper reminding me of to-do items put on hold. My phone still gets lost in my house, but it doesn’t matter. I don’t feel the same urgency to answer it immediately.
What a relief! For the first time in my life, I felt genuinely free.
How could this be? The world was in turmoil. Amid all the illness, sadness, unemployment, and loss of life, how could I feel tranquil?
People are sick and dying in every country. Workers on the front line are sleeping in their cars to protect their loved ones from this dreadful virus. And I have the chutzpah (audacity) to feel joy? How could I?
https://www.additudemag.com/podcast-adhd-adult-life-goals-after-pandemic-novotni/?src=embed_link
